How I work
The work follows the person, rather than fitting you to the model.
Therapy with me is relational and experiential. That means we are interested not only in explaining what has happened, but in how your experience is living in you now.
There is no particular state I need you to reach and no sequence you need to progress through. We begin with what is here.
A first meeting
You tell me what has brought you. I ask about the shape of your life now, and something of what came before.
I do not work through a standard list of questions. I do not try to quantify you. Mostly I am listening for what is actually here — not only the account you have arrived with, but what happens as you tell it.
By the end, we will usually have some sense of whether to continue.
Either answer is a reasonable one and you are not obliged to decide in the room.
What a session tends to be like
Much of it is talking. But we go slowly enough that you can notice what is happening while you speak — a tightening somewhere, a tendency to want to skip past something, a shift in tone, an emerging image or a feeling that arrives before the words for it do.
I may ask a question, offer an observation, or invite us to slow something down and stay with it a little longer.
Not to make it more intense, but because something easily passed over can sometimes tell us more than another round of explanation.
At other times the most useful thing is to let something unfold without trying to make it go anywhere.
Some sessions are quiet. Some are practical. At times we may work with bodily experience, imagery, different parts of experience, or a sand tray when words are not quite enough.
What we do depends on what is present, not on what stage of a protocol we are at.
What I am paying attention to
01 · Experience
Not only what you think about something, but what happens as you encounter it.
Emotion. Bodily sensation. Impulse. Imagery. Silence. What becomes vivid and what disappears from awareness.
Sometimes we understand something perfectly well and still find ourselves living it. Experiential work gives us a chance to encounter what we already know in another way.
02 · Relationship
Therapy is not something I do to you.
What happens between us can sometimes help us understand something about how you experience relationships. It can also tell us something about the particular relationship we are creating together.
Neither of us stands outside the room as a neutral observer.
03 · Context
A person's difficulties do not arise in isolation.
Your experience takes shape within relationships, history, family, work, culture, responsibility, opportunity and the circumstances in which you learned to live.
The question is therefore not simply, What is wrong with me?
Often a more useful question is, How did this come to make sense?
Pace
Going slowly does not mean avoiding change.
The pace matters.
We do not need to push past something because it appears to be the next therapeutic step. Nor do we need to avoid something simply because it is uncomfortable.
We can find out together what can be approached, how, and when.
Sometimes slowing down is what finally allows us to see what has been happening too quickly to notice.
Seeing clearly
Therapy is not always about becoming more accepting or comfortable.
Sometimes seeing something clearly means recognising that a situation is genuinely harmful, that a boundary needs to be drawn, that a relationship needs to change, or that a burden was never yours to carry.
What follows from seeing clearly is not always peace. Sometimes it is action.
What I don't do
I don't diagnose, and I don't work from a manual.
I won't hand you techniques for managing yourself more efficiently, though some things do become easier.
Diagnostic language can sometimes be useful, but I do not begin by asking what category you belong to. A diagnosis can describe something important; it cannot fully explain a person.
I also won't talk you into accepting something that ought to be resisted.
Over time
Change is often slower than people expect, and sometimes more visible looking backwards than while it is happening.
Not a steady climb.
More that something which might once have swallowed you turns out, months later, to be manageable — and you notice afterwards.
Or you recognise an old pattern sooner.
You say something you would previously have swallowed.
You remain present in a difficult conversation.
You discover that a preference, limit or need can exist without requiring a perfect justification.
What changes is usually not the circumstances first.
It is how much room you have inside them.
The aim is not to become unaffected by life. It is to have more room in how you meet it.
In person, and fortnightly
I prefer to work with you in person.
A great deal becomes available when two people share a room that is harder to encounter through a screen — changes in pace, posture, silence, distance, energy. There is also something about simply having another person there with you that is part of the work itself.
Each session is about an hour and I usually suggest fortnightly. It leaves room for life to happen and for something to settle between one session and the next, without so long a gap that we lose the thread. Some people begin weekly and move to fortnightly once things are steadier. We can decide together what rhythm makes sense.
How my training informs the work
My work is informed by relational, experiential, systemic and developmental traditions.
I have trained across approaches including Gestalt therapy, Internal Family Systems, systemic practice, sandplay and other experiential methods.
These approaches give me different ways of noticing and working.
They help me notice what is happening and where something new may become possible. They are not templates you need to fit into.
Practicalities
About an hour per session
Primarily in person in Singapore
Usually fortnightly
S$160
Confidentiality
What you share in therapy remains confidential, apart from the usual ethical and legal limits which we will discuss before beginning.
Getting started
Send me a message through the contact page. I will reply and we can decide together whether a first meeting makes sense.
Get in touch →
Menu
How I work
The work follows the person, rather than fitting you to the model.
Therapy with me is relational and experiential. That means we are interested not only in explaining what has happened, but in how your experience is living in you now.
There is no particular state I need you to reach and no sequence you need to progress through. We begin with what is here.
A first meeting
You tell me what has brought you. I ask about the shape of your life now, and something of what came before.
I do not work through a standard list of questions. I do not try to quantify you. Mostly I am listening for what is actually here — not only the account you have arrived with, but what happens as you tell it.
By the end, we will usually have some sense of whether to continue.
Either answer is a reasonable one and you are not obliged to decide in the room.
What a session tends to be like
Much of it is talking. But we go slowly enough that you can notice what is happening while you speak — a tightening somewhere, a tendency to want to skip past something, a shift in tone, an emerging image or a feeling that arrives before the words for it do.
I may ask a question, offer an observation, or invite us to slow something down and stay with it a little longer.
Not to make it more intense, but because something easily passed over can sometimes tell us more than another round of explanation.
At other times the most useful thing is to let something unfold without trying to make it go anywhere.
Some sessions are quiet. Some are practical. At times we may work with bodily experience, imagery, different parts of experience, or a sand tray when words are not quite enough.
What we do depends on what is present, not on what stage of a protocol we are at.
What I am paying attention to
01 · Experience
Not only what you think about something, but what happens as you encounter it.
Emotion. Bodily sensation. Impulse. Imagery. Silence. What becomes vivid and what disappears from awareness.
Sometimes we understand something perfectly well and still find ourselves living it. Experiential work gives us a chance to encounter what we already know in another way.
02 · Relationship
Therapy is not something I do to you.
What happens between us can sometimes help us understand something about how you experience relationships. It can also tell us something about the particular relationship we are creating together.
Neither of us stands outside the room as a neutral observer.
03 · Context
A person's difficulties do not arise in isolation.
Your experience takes shape within relationships, history, family, work, culture, responsibility, opportunity and the circumstances in which you learned to live.
The question is therefore not simply, What is wrong with me?
Often a more useful question is, How did this come to make sense?
Pace
Going slowly does not mean avoiding change.
The pace matters.
We do not need to push past something because it appears to be the next therapeutic step. Nor do we need to avoid something simply because it is uncomfortable.
We can find out together what can be approached, how, and when.
Sometimes slowing down is what finally allows us to see what has been happening too quickly to notice.
Seeing clearly
Therapy is not always about becoming more accepting or comfortable.
Sometimes seeing something clearly means recognising that a situation is genuinely harmful, that a boundary needs to be drawn, that a relationship needs to change, or that a burden was never yours to carry.
What follows from seeing clearly is not always peace. Sometimes it is action.
What I don't do
I don't diagnose, and I don't work from a manual.
I won't hand you techniques for managing yourself more efficiently, though some things do become easier.
Diagnostic language can sometimes be useful, but I do not begin by asking what category you belong to. A diagnosis can describe something important; it cannot fully explain a person.
I also won't talk you into accepting something that ought to be resisted.
Over time
Change is often slower than people expect, and sometimes more visible looking backwards than while it is happening.
Not a steady climb.
More that something which might once have swallowed you turns out, months later, to be manageable — and you notice afterwards.
Or you recognise an old pattern sooner.
You say something you would previously have swallowed.
You remain present in a difficult conversation.
You discover that a preference, limit or need can exist without requiring a perfect justification.
What changes is usually not the circumstances first.
It is how much room you have inside them.
The aim is not to become unaffected by life. It is to have more room in how you meet it.
In person, and fortnightly
I prefer to work with you in person.
A great deal becomes available when two people share a room that is harder to encounter through a screen — changes in pace, posture, silence, distance, energy. There is also something about simply having another person there with you that is part of the work itself.
Each session is about an hour and I usually suggest fortnightly. It leaves room for life to happen and for something to settle between one session and the next, without so long a gap that we lose the thread. Some people begin weekly and move to fortnightly once things are steadier. We can decide together what rhythm makes sense.
How my training informs the work
My work is informed by relational, experiential, systemic and developmental traditions.
I have trained across approaches including Gestalt therapy, Internal Family Systems, systemic practice, sandplay and other experiential methods.
These approaches give me different ways of noticing and working.
They help me notice what is happening and where something new may become possible. They are not templates you need to fit into.
Practicalities
Confidentiality
What you share in therapy remains confidential, apart from the usual ethical and legal limits which we will discuss before beginning.
Getting started
Send me a message through the contact page. I will reply and we can decide together whether a first meeting makes sense.
Get in touch →